{"product_id":"scariest-thing-here-is-my-bank-account-shirt","title":"Scariest Thing Here Is My Bank Account Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eScariest Thing Here Is My Bank Account is printed on the front of the tee — the line people read before they say anything.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA sarcastic halloween shirt for women with the joke in bold type that still reads across a dark room. Oversized heavyweight fit, available in black or white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWear it for a Halloween party, the office costume day, a horror movie night, or a coffee run in October.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFunny Halloween gift for her, a gift for a best friend, or a sister with the same sense of humour.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePrinted on the front, one design per tee — no clutter, nothing that turns into a smudge after three washes. It works as the whole costume, or under a jacket when the effort runs out.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eUnisex sizing, so size up if you want the drop-shoulder look and stay true to size for a regular fit. More slogans in Funny Halloween Shirts for Women and Graphic Tees for Women — small drops, new designs added every season.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA soft, breathable tee that speaks with quiet humor. Made from lightweight Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, this crew-neck shirt sits neatly at the shoulders and drapes comfortably for everyday wear. The front bears a small, candid line in warm, muted red: \"I CAN'T FLIRT (I'M AFRAID OF WOMEN)\", while the back carries a bolder follow-up: \"MY MAMA DON'T LIKE YOU.\" Those lines land like a wink—self-aware, awkwardly charming, and honest. Built with side seams and shoulder tape for lasting shape, a ribbed knit collar that keeps its form, and a tear-away label for comfort, this tee balances thoughtful construction with deadpan personality. Sustainably produced materials and REACH compliance add a considerate finish to a shirt that makes social humor wearable.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton; lightweight 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²) for breathability\u003cbr\u003e- Side seams and shoulder tape for improved fit retention and structure\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit collar with seam and retail crew neckline for a neat, classic look\u003cbr\u003e- Prints produced using crisp DTF or vibrant DTG methods depending on provider; tear-away label to reduce irritation\u003cbr\u003e- REACH certified; ethically manufactured with provenance from Honduras and Bella+Canvas quality standards\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: medium heat\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":53972732838188,"sku":"33777505581703881123","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":53972732870956,"sku":"27893590636901922832","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":53972732903724,"sku":"19205471240016772594","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":53972732936492,"sku":"26915395537063881529","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":53972732969260,"sku":"18262333812070422094","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":53972733002028,"sku":"88856902609255002341","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":53972733034796,"sku":"22485767003811948946","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":53972733067564,"sku":"30313043070793534192","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972733100332,"sku":"12330357194521863658","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":53972733133100,"sku":"30532479082022318888","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972733165868,"sku":"11892504634644219042","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":53972733198636,"sku":"30785264367101760929","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972733231404,"sku":"16414920905081277961","price":33.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":53972733264172,"sku":"32024831684641332661","price":33.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972733296940,"sku":"26090343413191296232","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ White","offer_id":53972733329708,"sku":"17275765330487163499","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972733362476,"sku":"29681299212477490635","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ White","offer_id":53972733395244,"sku":"17085874669428747202","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0976\/6600\/7340\/files\/7843472854942608172_2048.jpg?v=1787650734","url":"https:\/\/teelay.com\/products\/scariest-thing-here-is-my-bank-account-shirt","provider":"Teelay","version":"1.0","type":"link"}