{"product_id":"not-a-zombie-just-a-father-shirt","title":"Not A Zombie, Just A Father. Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003e“Not A Zombie, Just A Father.” is printed on the front of the tee — the line people read before they say anything.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA funny halloween shirt for men with the joke in bold type that still reads across a dark room. Oversized heavyweight fit, available in black or white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWear it for trick-or-treat night, a Halloween party, the pumpkin patch, or the 6am shift after it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFunny Halloween gift for dad, a gift for a new father, or the man doing the trick-or-treat lap.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePrinted on the front, one design per tee — no clutter, nothing that turns into a smudge after three washes. It works as the whole costume, or under a jacket when the effort runs out.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eUnisex sizing, so size up if you want the drop-shoulder look and stay true to size for a regular fit. More slogans in Funny Halloween Shirts for Women and Graphic Tees for Women — small drops, new designs added every season.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA soft, breathable tee that speaks with quiet humor. Made from lightweight Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, this crew-neck shirt sits neatly at the shoulders and drapes comfortably for everyday wear. The front bears a small, candid line in warm, muted red: \"I CAN'T FLIRT (I'M AFRAID OF WOMEN)\", while the back carries a bolder follow-up: \"MY MAMA DON'T LIKE YOU.\" Those lines land like a wink—self-aware, awkwardly charming, and honest. Built with side seams and shoulder tape for lasting shape, a ribbed knit collar that keeps its form, and a tear-away label for comfort, this tee balances thoughtful construction with deadpan personality. Sustainably produced materials and REACH compliance add a considerate finish to a shirt that makes social humor wearable.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton; lightweight 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²) for breathability\u003cbr\u003e- Side seams and shoulder tape for improved fit retention and structure\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit collar with seam and retail crew neckline for a neat, classic look\u003cbr\u003e- Prints produced using crisp DTF or vibrant DTG methods depending on provider; tear-away label to reduce irritation\u003cbr\u003e- REACH certified; ethically manufactured with provenance from Honduras and Bella+Canvas quality standards\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: medium heat\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":53972734017836,"sku":"29695294197588262100","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ White","offer_id":53972734050604,"sku":"23530381364299885563","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":53972734083372,"sku":"27963059311103369903","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":53972734116140,"sku":"22408472684832732282","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":53972734148908,"sku":"16961454406832224491","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":53972734181676,"sku":"30758451260979816539","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":53972734214444,"sku":"13357383367310265059","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":53972734247212,"sku":"20465613718060136083","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972734279980,"sku":"22140183821553467061","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":53972734312748,"sku":"12120847011372847640","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972734345516,"sku":"19143903909492890573","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":53972734378284,"sku":"17318969301084224466","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972734411052,"sku":"16817639077665073000","price":33.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":53972734443820,"sku":"26486608605873008715","price":33.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972734476588,"sku":"18828045249729325215","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ White","offer_id":53972734509356,"sku":"18047465254177017119","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ Black","offer_id":53972734542124,"sku":"87096601052459693814","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ White","offer_id":53972734574892,"sku":"17774459245146720271","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0976\/6600\/7340\/files\/2000256159582100910_2048.jpg?v=1787650901","url":"https:\/\/teelay.com\/products\/not-a-zombie-just-a-father-shirt","provider":"Teelay","version":"1.0","type":"link"}